Wow, I can’t believe this is online.
I loved watching this when I was a kid.
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x21wzox_pippi-longstocking-1969_shortfilms
Category: Uncategorized
Featured Blog Post: Chobani Kids Yogurt
So, recently I heard about Chobani’s project for Chobani Kids Yogurt asking parents to discuss ways to encourage children to eat healthy.
We usually don’t do formal snacks, so they were a little more than extremely thrilled for this event.
I’ve gotten emails about products before, but I am not terribly interested in reviewing tons of stuff on here. I am a writer, and I’d kind of like to keep it that way, for the most part. However, there are some things I really, genuinely think are awesome ideas, or sites, or products…and I actually love to do reviews of them if I have the chance.
The thing is, I actually love Chobani yogurt. It is a good company and it makes good yogurt. I actually have a yogurt maker to make my own yogurt (mmmm….geeky), but I still pick up yogurt at the store once in a while when I don’t want to spend the time boiling milk and letting the tiny jars sit in the maker for 12 hours. It’s darn good homemade yogurt…but it does take a while.
The Chobani Kids Yogurt comes in little packets with twist tops, which makes it easy to use for kids. I am certainly more comfortable letting them handle these, rather than my little glass yogurt jars that may or may not be completely off limits to people, since I have dropped and broken a few already, and had to order replacement jars… So these kids packets are fantastic for us, and I was thinking about how the kids could use these yogurt packets for different dishes.
Ultimately, what I want to impart on my kids in the kitchen is to see food as ingredients for anything. I want them to think, “what else can I do with this?” for every item of food. This keeps their culinary creativity fresh, and they will be able to explore the world of food with an open, and exciting, mind when they are older.
It was astonishing how successful this was with everyone. I was actually surprised how much I liked liked it! Yogurt is an extremely healthy food, and packed with protein which is going to help the kiddos grow up big and strong. The thing is, usually I don’t buy tubed yogurt for the kids, but Chobani has good yogurt with non-GMO ingredients and fresh fruit, and I trust it with my kids. I was very impressed with the quality of yogurt, and how it wasn’t loaded with sugar or unpronounceable ingredients.
I just don’t buy into gimmicky stuff with characters on it…but I will submit that the kids loved the yogurt, and the Marvel characters on the packets. And we are all Marvel geeks over here, so I can’t disagree with this 😉
So, this all being said, these are 3 dishes I came up with for the kids!
1) Get A Grip On Your Dip
2) Superhero Fruity Gyro
3) Black and Blueberry Yogurt Shortcake Party
(I didn’t have to name these…but, seriously? I name everything. I named our cars Black Thunder and Red 5. Because it’s awesome)
1) Get A Grip On Your Dip
We are a big family, and we are a busy family! It is important to have healthy snacks to keep us going. Veg and yogurt dips are the perfect solution for snacking on the go.
3 different types of yogurt dips for kids, made from the Chobani Kids Yogurt. The squeezable pouches make it easy for the kids to be hands-on in making their own recipe without making a mess. This is helpful especially with little hands so they have the positive satisfaction of completing it on their own.
The 3 dips with veg:
-Strawberry yogurt dip with slices of bananas
-Vanilla Chocolate Dust yogurt dip with slices of strawberries
-Banana yogurt with Nilla wafers
Review: This went over incredibly well. The kids absolutely loved this snack, and I liked how easily they could use the yogurt themselves without making a mess or wasting yogurt. They actually didn’t like the vanilla-chocolate yogurt very much…but I did!
2) Superhero Fruity Gyro
Creating healthy lunches is vital to healthy kids.
Teaching kids how to eat fun, healthy meals is crucial! With this recipe, the kids will help me mix melons, apples, mangoes and pineapples with mint and feta in a lettuce wrap, and top it off with Chobani Kids Yogurt for the finishing touch to their healthy, protein rich fruity gyro.
Review: I think this was the most fun and the most filling of the dishes. The kids all loved putting together their gyros on their own, and it was a little messy, but totally worth it. I made a dish for myself afterward, and I was surprised how alert and energetic I felt after! Definitely a better afternoon snack than chips and black coffee (*cough*….what?). We will actually be using this as a regular meal item after this, for sure.
3) Black and Blueberry Yogurt Shortcake Party
Yogurt between friends make the best friends with yogurt!
The best way to have fun with friends is to have a party with them! We will have a buffet of blackberry and blueberry sauce (cooked ahead of time), Chobani Kids Yogurts, and shortcakes with a little whipped cream on the side.
Review: This was obviously the most popular dish, since I let the kids have dessert in the middle of the day. I would highly suggest this for desserts, playdates, special occasions, birthdays…really, it was super simple and incredibly tasty.
So, for this one there was a little bit of prep to get it started:
- Homemade jelly
- Homemade whipped cream
- Chobani Kids Yogurt
- Shortcakes
Homemade Jelly: Frozen berries, 1/2 cup lemonade, 1 cup of white sugar. Boil for 15 minutes and let cool.
Homemade Whipped Cream: Take heavy whipping cream, add 1 tsp of vanilla, and use an electric beater until it forms peaks.
Let the kids pour the yogurt into the shortcake, then spoon the jelly on top, and then a dollop of whipped cream!
Dessert!
Fin.
Ruth’s Relationship Status: Uncomplicated
Last week we enjoyed Shavuot, which is the Jewish festival of firstfruits of the wheat harvest, as well as the day celebrating when Moses brought the Torah to Yisrael: “Finally, G-d gave Moses the two stone Tables of Testimony, containing the Ten Commandments, written by G-d Himself.“
An easy way to remember Shavuot is that it is the same day as Pentecost: God gave the Torah, and He gave the Spirit.
“The Torah was given by G‑d to the Jewish people on Mount Sinai more than 3300 years ago. Every year on the holiday of Shavuot we renew our acceptance of G‑d’s gift, and G‑d “re-gives” the Torah. The word Shavuot means “weeks.” It marks the completion of the seven-week counting period betweenPassover and Shavuot.” (chabad.org)
Traditionally, the entire book of Ruth is read on Shavuot, so, I was reading all 4 chapters of Ruth…I remember it being a little longer than 4 chapters, for some reason. But, 4 chapters it was. I always had read the book of Ruth as a love story between Boaz and Ruth, but now I am reading it and noticing that the whole thing basically took place in the fields! So, that makes sense, being the festival of wheat harvests.
“The Book of Ruth was recorded by the prophet Samuel. It is appropriate to read the Book of Ruth on Shavuot for two reasons: First, because Shavuot is a harvest festival and the Book of Ruth gives us a picture of the harvest, and how the poor were treated in the harvest season with sympathy and love. Secondly, because Shavuot is the anniversary of the passing of King David, who was the great-grandson of Ruth and Boaz, whose story is told in the Book of Ruth.” (chabad.org)
When I just started the book, though, I was completely struck with how close Naomi and Ruth were. These were women who had come together through Ruth’s marriage to Naomi’s son, experienced deaths of husbands together, and clung to each other in friendship through life and through hardships.
“Naomi was loving to Ruth and Orpah, and while Orpah decided to return back to her mother, Ruth wanted to stay with Naomi.
Then they lifted up their voices and wept again. And Orpah kissed her mother-in-law, but Ruth clung to her.
15 And she said, “See, your sister-in-law has gone back to her people and to her gods; return after your sister-in-law.” 16 But Ruth said, “Do not urge me to leave you or to return from following you. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. 17 Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried. May the Lord do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you.” 18 And when Naomi saw that she was determined to go with her, she said no more.“
This is such an incredible picture of friendship between women.
But…in reality, they had something more than friendship. The relationship Naomi and Ruth had was something akin to “kenzoku,” which is, “is a Japanese term which means “family”, a bond that is shared by people with the same or nearly the same ideals, have the same commitment or even destiny. We know and feel the presence of the deepest connection of friendship. These people may be family members, a friend from high school, co-workers who we probably haven’t talked to in decades but we know they are there for us when we need them. Time and distance do nothing to cut the bond we have with them.”
These women loved each other. They were friends and they were family; they were kenzoku. I am honestly moved just thinking about the two of them holding hands and traveling home, together.
Sometimes, relationships in life can be complicated.
Friendships in school when we were kids was rather uncomplicated. We all had our friends, and we knew who definitely weren’t our friends; but adults can be complicated, sometimes.
The other day I got a message out of the blue from someone I used to know. We were not close, at all, and I had only talked with her once on the phone sometime last year, and it was for something in particular. I did not have any sort of relationship with her, because we weren’t friends.
I haven’t even seen her since last year, when we were both attendants of the same group; so getting a message from her was surprising. Without any context, she simply said:
“I am sad you unfriended me.”
Which was also odd…because if I remember somewhat correctly, I closed the connection with this woman sometime around last summer. It’s been almost a year. I haven’t talked with her or heard from her in ages. Our kids never became friends, I never got together with her, our husbands never talked. I really don’t know what this meant…there is zero context on this statement.
Odd. A little complicated. But odd.
Now, with any other situation I might have seen this as an open door to rekindle something. But, there really aren’t embers to rekindle anywhere.
There never was a friendship with her, because there was no relationship with her.
Friends, especially kenzoku friends, aren’t complicated because love isn’t complicated. It really isn’t. You know when someone loves you, and you definitely know when they don’t. This is one thing you don’t need to debate back and forth: if someone loves you, you feel loved. If someone doesn’t love you…what is there?
The thing about friends, is that they are part of your life. They call you and see how things are going. They text you once in a while to connect with you. You feel better after being with them and sharing your life with them. Friends include you. They encourage you. I can think of friends I have had for years, and I look forward to talking to them every time we get on the phone together. I truly enjoy including them, and encouraging them in their lives, and I look forward to being included in their lives and being encouraged by their words. I love the friends in my life because they are amazing people who are part of my life.
Having a relationship with someone is so much more than just showing up and being a warm body. Mere attendance is not the soul of a relationship: the heart is.
A relationship is understanding your friends in ways no one else can. A relationship with your friends means you don’t bully them into obeying your own dogmas and expectations; which seems like and overly obvious quality, I think. A relationship with your friends is kind and generous.
A truly wonderful relationship with friends means you love them.
“Why did you do all this for me?’ he asked. ‘I don’t deserve it. I’ve never done anything for you.’ ‘You have been my friend,’ replied Charlotte. ‘That in itself is a tremendous thing.”
― E.B. White, Charlotte’s Web
It is a tremendous thing, indeed.
Who Are You?: Deep Thoughts in a Delicious Martini
One day I am going to have to actually get a martini shaker.
But today is not that day. Since I still have responsibilities during the day, and martinis are definitely an afternoon drink.
One day 🙂
So, let’s kick off the first of June with some mind-bending quizzes! Martinis or not….
Which Jung Archetype Best Describes You?
The Explorer
You’re the explorer! According to Jung we can find this archetype in many myths and fairy tales. You’re a restless nomad, always full of wanderlust. You see life as one big adventure and you’re always planning your next move. This archetype thirsts for new experiences and new people. You’re independent, adaptable, ambitious and true to yourself. Your sense of adventure is your greatest strength, but you may risk wondering aimlessly and you may find it difficult to choose a direction. Channel your adventurous spirit into something productive!
“you’re always planning your next move.” That is my Achilles’ Heel. It is very difficult for me to see “the now,” because my mind is plotting something to come. What is next? What can I learn today? How can I change? What else can we do?
What Are Your 5 Dominant Traits?
You Are (1) Edgy, (2) Experimental, (3) Open-Minded, (4) Artistic, And (5) Intuitive
Your five dominant traits are: edgy, experimental, open-minded, artistic, and intuitive. You have a strong need for individuality, and are revolutionary in your core. You live on your own terms, and would take a fierce stand in the face of strong opposition. You are wild, obscure, and an improviser; and you favor variety to routine.
I remember one time I was working with a Pastor on some art stuff, and they said they wanted some “edgy” artwork on a bulletin board in the foyer.
So I put up Georgia O’Keefe paintings.
And it didn’t go well. And they were taken down.
*snicker*
That’s what “edgy” is, guys.
What Drives Your Life?
Work
You are obsessed with work! You are a very busy person and don’t have time for the little things in life. You tend to lock yourself away so you can focus. People just don’t seem to understand how important life is! But you know, and if no one else is going to handle the big things, then you are going to do it yourself!
I am enormously task oriented. I can definitely see this.
I also tend to take over…although, I would rather not at this point in my life. I used to take over everything when I was younger, but now…I’m okay letting someone else steer their own ships. My fleet has its own adventure to discover in Carthage (I’m lookin’ at you, Aeneas).
The Loyal Friend
People see you as levelheaded and watchful. Although you do not make friends too quickly or easily, you are extremely loyal to friends you do make, and expect the same loyalty in return. You would favor a rational solution to an emotional one, and find a logical outcome to be worthwhile and rewarding.
I am extremely loyal to my friends. Extremely. I love my friends to the ends of the earth.
And I dismiss my foes.
Can We Guess Your IQ?
IQ: 181 (WOW!!)
You are a genius! Your IQ range is 170 – 185!!!Only 0.1% of the population get this score.You have a passion for perfection, you like to challenge yourself, and you appreciate diversity. You are committed to personal aesthetics, excel in finding problems and solutions, and have a driving force to create. You have boundless imagination and an open mind. In simple words: You Are Simply A Genius!
Famous people who got similar scores are such geniuses as Quentin Tarantino and James Woods.
I don’t know, that’s pretty good for a facebook quiz. Do I finally get to go to Yale??
Name: Tamarah Ann Rockwood
Accomplishments: Got 180% on a Facebook IQ test
Graduate Degree Application: World Domination through blogging.
They would be fools to turn me away.
Japanese
Demure, feminine and gentle with beautiful skin and shiny hair, your beauty is Japanese! Complete with grace, style and a sophisticated approach to the world, you are a modern day beauty with a bright and promising future! Now that’s beautiful!
This doesn’t surprise me too much.
However…
The truth is that I look like every other brunette from Nova Scotia. Round face, slightly pale skin, looming forehead, straight dark hair, strong but feminine body?
Scottish lineage from Nova Scotia.
Case in point: Ellen Page
Halifax, Nova Scotia: represent.(Quick)True Story: I’m Not Really Sure How They’ll Turn Out In The End, To Be Honest.
The other day we took a day trip over to Seattle, proper. We don’t live in Seattle, proper. We live a boatride away.
It’s awesome.
So we went to Seattle for the day, just exploring and checking things out. Last November I had taken the kids to Golden Gardens Park, which was quite lovely and attached to a huge beach. We loved it. Plus, it was empty, which made my levels of anxiety regarding losing a kid in a park almost nil. We all wanted to go back and play at this magical park again.
Unfortunately, last time we were there was the end of Fall. Now is the end of Spring. It was packed with people, bbqs, volleyball nets and random mohawked circus jugglers.
If you haven’t seen “Hot Fuzz,” then this won’t make much sense. But it is hilarious.
So, we hung out at the tide pools and the kids collected a few billion caterpillars that are swarming on everything around here, and stuck them on their jeans and walked around with them. Eve named hers Nacho. Nacho the Caterpillar.
After that we were driving past the Locks, and stopped in to take a peek.
The Locks is this ginormous park that celebrates the Locks that separate the Washington Lake freshwater from the Sound saltwater, and allow ships and boats to go through without disturbing the water too much. It was neat. We watched a 1980s video in a dark room about it.
So, we were walking around and watching people’s boats go through the Locks, and on the other side we found the Salmon Ladder.
This ladder is to make sure the salmon can migrate home without getting stuck in/on/around the boats. Apparently it is pretty successful, because they built this thing in like, 1916 and it has been managing boat travel and over a million salmon, or some crazy number, every year.
All this being said: we were standing in front of the fish ladder exhibit, which was rather interesting. If there were fish coming through, you would be able to watch them through the windows. However, we were past migratory season so we were just watching water. But still – pretty interesting to learn about.
The mesmerizing fish windows.
Well, next to the windows were little red buttons.
Underneath the red buttons was a plaque that said, “Push to hear audio about the types of salmon.”
However, no one read the plaque. Well, I did, but no one else noticed it was there.
So one of my little children looks at me and asks, “What does the red button do?”
Now, it has been a rather long day at this point and we are at the end of our urban hike, so I am a little tired.
This is the excuse I am using to justify my response.
“Well, if you push the red button the fish fall out.”
*wide eyed*
“So, can I push it?”
“Sure. But all the fish will fall out.”
I don’t even know what this means. The fish will fall out of where? Onto what? Into the auditorium? Into the water? So many questions!
But every one of the kids asked me the same question about the red button, and I said the exact same thing each time.
Ben was far too eager to get in on this action, and we discussed the fish (who weren’t even there) for a good long time while we were at this exhibit.
Needless to say, no one pushed the red button since no one wanted to hurt the fish.
I imagine, many years from now, my children will take their children to see the Salmon Ladder.
And they will look at the red buttons that will make the fish fall out, and they will be eager and ready to tell their children about this feature….when suddenly…
“WAIT! THIS BUTTON IS JUST FOR AUDIO!”
“THE FISH WON’T FALL OUT IF YOU……gaaahhhh…..Mooooommmmmm.”
Muahahaha. Mom strikes again.
The Platypus Club.
The Platypus Club.
It is starting.
Loki approves.
“Listen, this is a crazy idea…and it is a little off the beaten path.
But I think we can do this.”
The thing is, if you identify with The Platypus Theory, then you are a Platypus. Easy as that. And I think we should get together as a cool and groovy club once in a while. Except…
Except, most Platypi are not around my area. Some are in SanFrancisco, some are in Costa Rica, I think there are one or two in LosAngeles. There is another in the middle of California…so what am I going to do?
I’m going to have a club where I am….and you are going to have a club where you are.
BOOM.
Now, the thing with The Platypus Club is that it isn’t your normal club.
We aren’t going to have crafts, or speaker series’, or peddle stuff to each other.
We are there because when you meet a Platypus, you know it. There is something different. Something you can’t exactly put your finger on, but you can feel it. You can talk to them about religion, writing, politics, feelings, ideas, paleo recipes or face creams: it’s all good.
The Platypus Club is something akin to an alternative-Mother’s group. Sure, we might be moms at this point in our lives: but we would really, sincerely like to have a group with other intelligent women where we are talking about subjects beyond the brand of toilet paper we use. Granted, there are times when that is appropriate…and sometimes necessary. But maybe we could talk about our 5 year plan. Or even our 2 month plan. Have a garden you can’t get going? Dealing with an existential crisis this morning? Not sure what to do with your unpublished manuscript? Do you find yourself looking for exit strategies when you are stuck listening to conversations about where to buy picture frames for 45 minutes?
Listen, this is a crazy idea…and it is a little off the beaten path.
But I think we can do this.
I am planning on beginning my Platypus Club on the first Tuesday of the month. Mostly because I found a pub with an Open Mic on that day, and I’m utilizing that baby in a big way.
I think you should have a Platypus Club in your area.
I think you should invite a fellow Platypus out for a once-a-month Club night.
Be the spark in your galaxy.
Have your own Platypus Club.
We can do this.
Who: Invite fellow Platypi. If someone “doesn’t get it,” then I would say don’t push it. We are cool with who we are, despite whatever personal insecurities we might have (fear of big things in deep water, for example). The Platypus Club is not going to be a big club. We aren’t going to fill stadiums. But those who do want to come are some high quality individuals. You will remember being with them.
What: Have a beer, drink some tea, and own your night. It’s as easy as that. We have nothing to prove, and I certainly don’t think we need to conquer anything in particular. I think just an informal solidarity is pretty good. Overall, we are just chilling together because we have a very particular and unique understanding of each other…and that will speak volumes in itself. No need to complicate things with budget forms or committees.
Where: I would suggest a Pub, personally, but that might feel too committal at first. We are a touchy, sensitive sort. Start with a coffee house, and move up to a Pub. Or, heck…start with a Pub and have a cool down in a coffee house.
When: First Tuesday of the month. OR…whenever is good for you. It’s your club, baby 😉
That’s the plan!
Let’s make it happen!
/stickers and buttons coming soon!!
The Forest Fashionista: Off The Grid Fashion Tips
This article originally appeared on Ravishly.
Featured on:
The Forest Fashionista: Off The Grid Fashion Tips
pickaxe fashion
Honestly, it’s T-shirt and jeans almost every day. Which makes me think that either I have it all together, and I just have a balance between “comfortable” and “eclectic”…or I am living off the fashion grid, entirely.
I am a big believer in dressing for how you feel.
Feeling funky? Sweat pants and a comfy shirt are probably in your best interest.
Feeling sassy? Definitely a skirt and scarf.
Feeling like swimming? Probably whatever bathing suit you found at Target that you picked up on the way out, when you stopped in for shampoo and cat food.
Feeling like it’s Tuesday…. and you are trying to catch up with projects and still have no idea what to do for dinner?
Tshirt and jeans.
Honestly, it’s tshirt and jeans almost every day. Which makes me think that either I have it all together, and I just have a balance between “comfortable” and “eclectic”…or I am living off the fashion grid, entirely. I think a lot of people actually dress according to what is in season..? Like, apparently you can dress for Autumn, and there are some color requirements for that.
That is just too restricting for those of us in the forest.
We have “Forest Glamorous,” which means we are wearing nice jeans, a decent leather jacket and a fancy scarf.
Yet, there is life beyond just tshirt and jeans . There is more to an ensemble than denim and scarves.
Let me take you down the dusty roads into: Off The Grid Fashion Tips
Shirts:
I am trying to wear Ben’s shirts less, and my shirts more.
Even though his shirts are really comfortable, and don’t show my poochy belly or untoned arms as much.
As we can see in this forest ensemble, the model is sporting a lovely Firefly shirt she bought on the internet.
Pants:
Jeans.
I wear my size 12 jeans when I want to believe I am a size 12.
I wear my size 14 jeans when I am being realistic.
As we can see here, the forest dweller has emerged to enjoy the native coastline in a full denim ensemble: the overalls.
Also bought on the internet.
Capes:
Capes are the most underappreciated article of clothing.
Not only do they keep your arms and torso warm, but your legs as well! No more warm jackets protecting your upper body while letting your poor legs be pelted to death by chill.
Chill is only a frame of mind.
Bonus: hoodie feature.
Princess of Avalon? Maybe.
Hats:
If the caped hood is not your style, you can simply go with the classic – the hat.
A classic, wide brimmed hat…
or the simple, yet lovely, birdcage veil.
Wigs:
Another underutilized cranial accessory is the wig!
Why spend countless hours and hundreds of dollars to try to get your hair to another shade, when you can wear a wig!
It is easy as pie: braid your hair in the back or wrap it around your head and adorn your crown with the fabulous wig.
A lovely shade of purple may suit your ensemble…
Or a full spectrum of colors, for the colorly indecisive.
Further Accessories:
You may wish to accent your ensemble with rainbow socks:
Fully decked out in Mom’s socks…
Or a pickaxe.
There you have it, my friends.
A full spectrum of Off The Grid Fashion ideas to completely throw your fashion friends’ heads’ spinning.
But damn will you look good when you do.
Gluten Free BBQ Recipes…For Your Sanity
This article originally appeared on Ravishly.
Featured on:
How To Survive The Gluten Free BBQ
Tamarah’s Gluten Free Stuffed Mushrooms with Goat Cheese, Bacon, and AsparagusWhen you think of “Gluten Free BBQ Potlucks,” you may not be filled with spectacular joy.
The terror….it is overwhelming!!!!!
You may think of cardboard hamburgers. You may think of translucent quinoa crockpot stews. You may even think that “gluten free” is just the open doorway to kale salads.
Everyone has their own culinary fears surface when they think of gluten free BBQs.
But it can be great!
Trust me: I am not a fan of bad food. I like good food, and I refuse to give in to bland, questionable dishes at BBQs. BBQs should be filled with culinary solidarity! We should enjoy the meal, just as we enjoy the fellowship!
I have the pleasure of having Celiac, which I can unequivocally say has improved my quality of life.
Which is a weird thing to state, I understand.
“You ca’t have pizza?? Or doughnuts?? No french toast?? No KFC?? No burritos?!”
I don’t really miss any of these. Okay, I actually do really miss flour tortillas. There is nothing like biting into the soft flour tortilla for a burrito. I have tried gluten free tortillas, and they are all unconditionally terrible.
But the rest of the items I am forbidden to eat…I probably shouldn’t be eating anyway.
Before I discovered I had Celiac, I just ate whatever I desired. Since discovering this autoimmune blessing (yes, blessing), I have had to actually do research on what food I am not only putting into my body, but into my family’s as well. I have taught myself how to cook nutritious food from scratch that actually tastes amazing (these two do not always go hand in hand).
So, in the end, I my quality of life, and my quality of cooking, is significantly better because I have Celiac.
So, come.
Come, my friends.
Enjoy these gluten free BBQ recipes links this Memorial Day.
Sides
Quick Pickles
Brilliant Baked Beans
Goat Cheese, Bacon And Asparagus Stuffed Mushrooms
Potato Salad With A Kick
Gluten Free Garden Pasta Salad
Entr’ees
Gluten Free Octopus Hotdogs
Gluten Free Fried Chicken
Chickpea Burgers
and Gluten Free Hamburger Buns
Deserts
Pistachio Salad: The Salad of Champions
Gluten Free Lemon Meringue Pie
Gluten Free Carrot Cake Truffles
The Real Life and Times of Celiac
I have the pleasure of having Celiac, which I can unequivocally say has improved my quality of life.
Which is a weird thing to state, I understand.
“You ca’t have pizza?? Or doughnuts?? No french toast?? No KFC?? No burritos?!”
I don’t really miss any of these. Okay, I actually do really miss flour tortillas. There is nothing like biting into the soft flour tortilla for a burrito. I have tried gluten free tortillas, and they are all unconditionally terrible.
But the rest of the items I am forbidden to eat…I probably shouldn’t be eating anyway.
Before I discovered I had Celiac, I just ate whatever I desired. Since discovering this autoimmune blessing (yes, blessing), I have had to actually do research on what food I am not only putting into my body, but into my family’s as well. I have taught myself how to cook nutritious food from scratch that actually tastes amazing (these two do not always go hand in hand).
So, in the end, I my quality of life is significantly better because I have Celiac.
Unfortunately, there are drawbacks.
I cannot trust anything that has been pre-made. Anything. Even gluten free items. Even certified gluten free items.
I had to stop eating gluten free pasta, because I would have violent reactions (lack of breathing, flush cheeks, muscle spasms, etc) after eating gluten free pasta. Why is this…it is gluten free! Maybe the labeling says gluten free, but legally a company can include up to 0.025% gluten in their food, and still be considered gluten free. That 0.025% makes a difference when my body sees that as eating 0.025% poison I am putting in my body.
Lately I have had to stop eating the gluten free pizza in the Costco freezer section.
And last night I was in bed with another violent reaction to Udi’s Gluten Free Bread, which I never thought was a problem before. It is incredibly frustrating, since this was a safe option for me; but after a few tests over the course of a few weeks, you at some point you have to admit there is a problem. You aren’t just tired, you aren’t just imagining things. Laying in bed with muscle cramps and not being able to breathe, and then feeling fine 2-3 hours later, is a big indicator that there is something wrong.
So what is the problem with Udi’s Gluten Free Bread??? The ingredients are all gluten free…
“I think I found out why – after reviewing the ingredients – they have added a mold inhibitor which may be a sensitivity problem. I know with the Kraft Cracker Barrel cheese – this has been added as well – which may be why Kraft does not have this cheese on its gluten free web page. The other cheeses yes, but not this particular brand. The inhibitor is natamycin – and it seems that some do have a sensitivity to this type of preservative.” (celiac.com)
You are going to have to forgive my language for a second:
SONOFABITCH
The mold inhibitor?!!!!
GGGAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
So, I’m back to square one.
That is Celiac, my friends.
How Do You Sleep At Night?
I have never been a good sleeper.
When I was in elementary school, I would always wake up in the middle of the night for something. Sometimes it was random bloody noses, sometimes it was nightmares…sometimes I would just wake up. And lay there. Moving to the couch in the living room helped, because my grandfather was usually awake watching infomercials since he couldn’t sleep either. He usually got the big couch, and I got the loveseat. He also would leave his dentures under the coffee table, just out of obvious sight, when he started falling asleep, and let me tell you: that never failed to gross me out. In a good way. It is an endearing memory I have of him. I think grandfathers are allowed to troll their families in their own weird and subtle ways.
So, at 2:30 this morning, my 6 year old had a nightmare and came into our bedroom for help. As a child, though, I would stand next to my parents’ bed, and consequently freak them out by just staring at them trying to figure out if I should wake them up at all… he proceeded to jump on me and crawl into bed with the energy of a puppy.
So, I was very awake.
And it is 5:30.
And I am still awake.
I figured sleep just wasn’t coming, so I might as well get up and make the most of my time.
I believe that knowledge and awareness go a long way, and I have a feeling that I am going to become very aware of how tired I am around lunch time today, with the knowledge that I’ve had 2 hours of sleep.
With this in mind, I have the foreknowledge that I am going to be cranky.
This may be overthinking things a little bit…but I have nothing better to do right now. There are things that happen every day around here that bug me, but they are very little things that I can fix. None of them are a big deal at all. And I can handle them. When I am well rested. But today, I am not. So these little things are going to pile up quickly, and instead of reacting to them, I am going to anticipate my irritation and not react to them, since I saw them coming already!
Ha Ha!
Seriously, I need to sleep.
So here we go! 10 things I know will irritate me this afternoon!
1. Open cabinets. I don’t know why this bothers me to the degree it does, but walking into the kitchen and seeing an open cabinet just drives me nuts.
2. Cereal bowls left on the table.
3. Cereal bowls left on the couch.
4. Binder paper on the floor.
5. No one can find a pen.
6. They can find a pencil, but not a pencil sharpener.
7. I mess up the sandwich orders and give the sandwich with no jelly to the child who wanted the jelly, and the sandwich with jelly to the child who didn’t want the jelly, and go right into transcendental Socratic arguments of whether or not we really have the sandwich that we were intended to have, and what does jelly really mean anyway?
8. Coming downstairs to see the front door open, and then having to do a headcount.
9. Missing shoes.
10. These guys are basically going to be my inner monologue until I get some rest.
The Platypus Directive 
