This Week’s Menu

Sometimes it helps to see someone else’s menu to get some ideas for the week.

Cheers ūüôā

 

 

This Week’s Menu

Du Jour

Breakfast

Lunch

Dinner

Monday Greek yogurt & berries Cabbage & Quinoa Stir fry Stuffed Pulled BBQ Chicken Taters
Tuesday Egg in a Nest Stir Fry Stir Fry & Rice
Wednesday Greek 7 Layer Pizza Fried Rice
Thursday Oatmeal Open Faced Chicken Sandwich Chicken & Coleslaw
Friday PB Apple & Rice Cakes Sandwiches Homemade Chili Dogs

 

https://tamarahdotorg.wordpress.com/2015/06/22/this-weeks-menu/

Father’s Day Blueprint

Keep it simple for your husband.

Remind him how much you love him, and give him that which will delight his soul.

 

Hugs:

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Meals:

Rosemary and Tomato Lamb Roast

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Homemade Lemon Meringue Pie

Movies:

or

 

 

The Drink:

http://www.guinness.com/en-us/home.html

followed by

anything from Bruichladdich.

 

and…whatever else you like in the evenings.

ūüėČ

10 Alternative Uses For Alternative Medicines

This article originally appeared on Ravishly.

 

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10 Alternatives Uses For Alternative Medicine

I couldn‚Äôt listen to another puerile sales pitch in someone‚Äôs living room, promising the moon and then selling you something that ‚Äútastes just like sugar.‚ÄĚ (It doesn‚Äôt. Not even sort of.)

That’s all the warning you’ll get for this one.

If you are an American woman, because I can’t officially speak for other countries who may or may not have similar circumstances, you have been invited, and have probably attended, a MLM meeting.

A MLM meeting is a “multi-level marketing” meeting, where someone you know is selling something you either already have or never thought you needed and they will bring someone into their house to do a song and dance about why you not only need it, but your life will improve because of it.

Think of it as LARPing informercials.

 

I have an EO that will cure orcs….

 

The thing with MLM meetings is that they suck. So much. I have no love for MLM meetings, and real friends don’t invite me.

My snark is available in glossy catalogue form with a tear-out page in the back for subscriptions. Pro-level snark, my friends.

 

There was one year when Pampered Chef got ahold of my church, and I went to a different Pampered Chef meeting every few weeks for ever. ¬†I watched them showcase vegetable peelers, knives, pots, colanders, bowls…you know, all the stuff I already have in my kitchen. But¬†their¬†bowl will cook a chicken….in a microwave…in 40 minutes!!

 

Lady.

1. I don’t cook dinners in the microwave. I am far too kitchen-elite for that.

2. It is quicker in the pressure cooker, anyway. (noob)

 

At some point I am in the back of the room, trying to keep my brain from ejecting itself from my skull, with a pencil and some random envelope I found at the bottom of my purse doing the math on this lady. “Half the time,” “you can cook this in 5 minutes,” “steaming is a fraction of the time.” ¬†Dude…according to her, and math doesn’t lie, you can cook a whole chicken, with steamed green beans, and mashed potatoes, in 2.3 minutes. ¬†#win.

Yeah, so anyway that was when MLM really, finally jumped the shark for me. ¬†I was done. I couldn’t listen to another puerile sales pitch in someone’s living room, promising the moon and then selling you a bowl.

It’s a bowl. I don’t care how you cut it….a bowl is a bowl, no matter if it is glass, plastic or baby seal leather. ¬†IT’S A BOWL. ¬†I am listening to someone sales pitch me a bowl. gah.

 

We have all been there, and I know some people who love MLM meetings so much they have made it a part of their life. ¬†And more power to those ladies. It brings them joy in life, and I can’t disagree with that.

 

However.

 

The rest of us are stuck with yellow Tupperware bowls, sundry kitchen gadgets, essential oils, coconut oils, carrier oils and pink drinks.

What do you do with all this stuff??

I’ll tell you what you do:

 

10 Alternative Uses For Alternative Medicines

1. Essential Oils

We’re getting the big guns out of the way first.

If you are a friend of mine who uses essential oils, I just want to tell you I love you. ¬†But maybe you should skip to the part where I tear apart amber teething necklaces…

I think essential oils are really amazing oils. No two ways about it, they function in pretty amazing ways.  I think you can burn warts off with the lavender, or maybe it was the basil.  Even if you have a cold, the aromatherapy is very helpful. But I draw the line when they start curing epilepsy or sciatica. I seriously draw the line when women tell me they spray their backyard chickens with lavender essential oils.  It is just snake oil and crazy women at that point.

So what do you do with the bottles you are stuck with? Because you bought a few bottles to support your friend. I know it.

Lavender Рuse a carrier pigeon to carry it away.

Frankensense Р This is a great anti-fungal oil, and you can spray it on windows, or onto facebook, to wipe the smug off.

Peppermint, Grapefruit, Chamomile, Lemon – Apparently this is helpful for mood-enhancing, and possibly time-travel.

Tea Tree Oil – Great for healing and re-growing limbs.

Essential Oils For Cats – Because they weren’t imperial enough, as it was. I would suggest rosemary, if you must. Or lemon. Honestly, if you are putting essential oils on your cats, maybe you should ask them what they like.

It is important to remember that essential oils do have the ability to turn you into a vampire, and will be unable to stand in direct sunlight after applying.

2. Coconut Oil

The ugly step-sister to essential oils, coconut oil will cure diabetes, help you lose 50 pounds and fix your broken sprinklers.

Experts in the field highly suggest using coconut oil to lubricate sticks lodged in difficult places.

3. DIY-everything

Have you ever thought, “I could probably make that”? ¬†Sure! We all have!

Have you ever thought, “I should make my own sunscreen?” ¬†or “I should build my own goat”? Of course you have, and you have a Pinterest page to prove it.

 

If you say things like, “This is¬†like¬†soap,” then it isn’t soap.

An alternative use for something that is like soap could be to plant it in the ground and grow a Sancimoni-Tree that produces it’s own Self-Righteou-Sap.

4. Amber Teething Necklaces

You can chew on them all day long, and they still won’t give you the DNA you need to make dinosaurs.

Might as well just hang them on your rear-view mirror.

 

5. Sugar

Sugar could possibly be the downfall of Western Civilization.

It could be.

Is it really an alternative medicine, though? ¬†Well, Mary Poppins thought so…and are you going to argue with Mary Poppins? Have you seen anybody argue with Mary Poppins? ¬†Of course not. Because technically¬†they don’t exist anymore.

If you know someone who believes sugar is the work the Devil, and thinks it is completely normal¬†to make birthday cakes out of whipped cashews, palm oil, coconut oil, olive oil and almond paste…then maybe they need to step slowly away from the naturopath cookbook they bought at a MLM meeting, and remember that sugar¬†is actually okay. It’s okay. ¬†We’ll all just say that together: sugar¬†is not our enemy.

But these Pinterest alternative recipes sure are.

Because saying something is like a cake does not make it a cake. It makes it a gray, gelatinous goo in a cupcake liner that has the consistency of toothpaste.

And no one should blow out a birthday candle in toothpaste.

 

6. Gluten

Oh yes. The Gluten.

Gluten is also not the downfall of Western civilization.  Gluten Free is not the alternative to life.

Simply put, anything replacing gluten is an alternative to taste.

I don’t have a choice in the matter, but you still do! ¬†Go! Save yourselves from the overabundance of rice flour and potato starch!

An alternative use for gluten free cinnamon rolls: solar panel epoxy.

Gluten free pasta may be used for: fish bait

Gluten free tortillas could possibly substitute for: bridal wedding veils.

 

7. Fermented Anything

For a while, anything fermented would cure anything. A cold? Autism? Measles? The pox? Syphilis? Fermented green beans will cure them all through the magic of ferment.

If you have to hide something in the back of a hot closet in a pot for 3 weeks, and bring it out and try to convince me that it is the best wet moss I have ever tasted, I am going to tell you my opinions on the matter. And unlike your 3 month old mostly forgotten sauerkraut, my opinions are fresh and zesty.

Fermented foods can be great. Truth be told, I do love me some good sauerkraut.  From a jar. That I bought. From a store. That has the FDA backing it up.

The back of someone’s pantry that has mice and pantry moths traveling through it does not.

So, what else can we do with the thousands of mason jars filled with seasonal vegetables, fermented with milk and forgotten in time?

You back slowly away and do not make eye contact with the jar.

 

 

8. Any Drink That Rhymes With Pink.

If you think

any drink

that rhymes with pink

might help you shrink…

Perhaps an alternative use for the money you spent

would be better used, in a large percent,

On a bridge I have to sell

through a certified London cartel.

 

9. Bone Broth

Bone broth is not an anagram for bourbon.

 

10. Hugs

There is no alternative to hugs. Apply liberally and with great umph.

You will cure many ills and ailments with this one, though.

 

 

 

Crazy Dreams

Last night I had crazy dreams.

I had a dream some guy gave me a potion of some sort…but it looked weird.

Well, everything looked weird. The whole setting was in this orange light, 1970s blurry Kodak lens filter. Everything around me was old, but I was moving out so it was cool. There was this horrible marbled shag carpet on the floor, there was a dusty exercise bike that someone had tried giving to me in the living room that I passed as I was walking out, and I was leaving. ¬†No idea where, but this place I had called home was old and, baby, I was movin’ on.

After that I started running, in an orange dress, to boot.

I just ran and I had all this crazy energy to run, which is not like me at all. I really hate running…but I just had this fire inside me, and I was going somewhere. It was the most incredible feeling. ¬†Just running without pain. ¬†All joy. ¬†Going somewhere amazing, but who knows where that was.

Who was the guy with the potion? ¬†He looked like Mr. Wizard, but his appearance was brief. I think he said, “you need this,” and then just watched me take off. ¬†And the potion…it was more like these little pills of light, and I don’t remember taking them. I just held them in my hand and they incorporated themselves into me.

Man that was a weird dream.  But I feel amazing this morning.

 

5 Things You Probably Should Tell Grads

This article originally appeared on Ravishly.

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5 Things You Probably Should Tell Grads

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Typical advice: Go out there and find yourself…on the precipice of death overlooking a valley of broken dreams, student loans and tears.

 

I have graduated from high school, Jr. College and University. So I have seen some graduation ceremonies…I also graduated from Jr. High, and there was a ceremony, but no one gave me advice on what to do with my life after that one. ¬†So I’m just going to figure it didn’t count.

During my life I have gotten my real estate license (yes, really), worked in an art gallery, done sundry retail gigs, and have been a certified substitute teacher for private and public schools.

I have also done odds and ends here and there, such as seamstressing, poetry, editing a poetry journal, birthed and homeschooled my kids and….oh, a bunch of other little things.

What I am trying to say is that no matter what I have done, or where I have gone, or to which great height I have reached in my life: there has always been someone to meet me with ridiculous and inapplicable advice for my life.

 

“Go into XYZ, you’ll make a lot of money and have a good career that way!”¬†unless you are a fortune telling sorcerer hedge fund manager, I don’t see this.

“Are you going to be a doctor? You should be a doctor.”¬†are you a doctor?? Because I have this thing on my foot…

“So what are you going to major in college? I always wanted to major in computers.”¬†ah, yes. “the computers.” very specific. What degree does a SysAdmin need, again?

 

Graduation season is upon us, and I think it is only appropriate to give some non-sucky advice to the rascals who are about to embark on the world.

This  just about sums it up.

1. Go for a future you want to build.

The entire point of being here, on a meta level, is to build a better future. You aren’t going to be building a better future if you are living someone else’s vision. ¬†What I mean is, if you want to go to college to study French Renaissance Poetry…then by golly, do it! The worst advice I ever got was advice I actually took…go into real estate, or go into computers. I have passion for neither of these, and yet I actually got my real estate license and I actually started taking computer programming classes in college. ¬†Neither of those two fields have anything to do with what I am interested in, and I hated them both. Hated them. Passionately. Because I was devoting my life to something I not only didn’t love, but I also felt pushed into them. Nothing says passion for life like being pushed off a cliff.

I figured out, after a few years in community college, that I should probably focus on what I am¬†good¬†at in life. Not just what will fulfill someone else’s dream of their vision of the future.

So I started taking writing and literature courses, and I found actual joy in life, and I never looked back.

 

2. Inspiration will be found in weird places. Do not discredit oddly placed inspiration.

One quarter in college I had to take an anthropology class to meet an under-grad requirement, and it very quickly became my favorite class that semester.

After that, I found as many ways possible to take anthropology classes to meet requirements for my degree. ¬†Linguistics, cultural anthropology, physical anthropology…I loved them all. ¬†Not enough to drop my major in literature, but certainly enough to have one anthropology class every quarter. I think I am 8 units away from having a minor in anthropology, which I would love to finish one day.

What I found was that the flow of anthropology courses was a way to keep a common thread going in my studies, which helped me keep on track of what I was studying. It was also a subject that I truly enjoyed, and brought inspiration to my studies and to my greater understanding.

I never saw the glow of inspiration radiating off the Anthropology department before that, but it was certainly there after.

 

3. Conformity isn’t going to help you get out of the box of ¬†group-think alleigance.

I spent years writing essays on many literary subjects, from Marxism to Feminism to Reader Response. These were definitely new philosophies for me to explore, and it took a while to really understand what a “different perspective” even meant.

The biggest take-away I have, after years of essay writing, is that the box is not your friend.

The box is what they built for us in school as a model for thinking. But once you are in college classes, it would behoove you to step outside the foundations of the box and start looking at subjects from other perspectives. This is going to give you the advantage over a mediocre B+ paper that gets most of the ideas correct, and a stellar A+ paper that fully understands the point of expanding the subject.  High School writing might have appreciated interesting theses, but college is looking for people who are thinking different theses, all together, on a broader scale of understanding.

I’ll give you an example:¬†Frankenstein¬†is not about a man. It is not man vs. machine. It isn’t even¬†man vs. man. ¬†It is about a grieving mother who lost every baby to whom she gave birth. The story is her ode to the failure of creating life. If you can read¬†Frankenstein¬†through that perspective, then you are on a good path.

4. Audit different classes in your free time

I know that sounds weird, but it is fantastic advice.

Auditing classes is free. You just sit there and take in the knowledge they are handing out…this will help you understand many subjects in different ways, and it will definitely give you the leg up on recognizing patterns in culture, economics, biology, literary movements, etc.

5. You need to relax.

I am more of a type A person than not, and it took me years to figure out how to relax.

There is time for work, there is time for hard work, there is going to be time for completely stressing out and losing your mind…

and then there will be time to relax.  Take this time as seriously as you take your finals.  The time you spend relaxing will be the time when your mind starts to unwind, and you will be able to think clearly again. This is the time when your creativity will unleash itself. You will start putting things together while you are relaxed, and when it is time to get back to work you will have an arsenal of new ideas to back you up.

So there you go!  Good advice for the new grad!

Now go be amazing!

(no pressure)

Forget Flying Cars: How Was Jane Jetson The Future Mom??

This article originally appeared on Ravishly.

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Why Jane Jetson Had The Future Figured Out

 

When we think of the future, the first thing we think of is flying cars.

Flying cars are the future. We can all agree on that.

After flying cars comes hoverboards, self-lacing high tops and crazy viewmaster sunglasses…for some reason.

 

 

Viewmaster: by GoogleGlasses

When I think of what the future should look like by now, I am thinking on a much bigger scale, though. Viewmaster sunglasses aren’t cutting it for me, at this point. ¬†I have bigger concerns.

Such as:¬†¬†where is my self-folding washer/dryer machine? Where is my instant-food-rehydrator? ¬†How about some Star Trek tricorder so I could diagnose my kids with precision and accuracy, without having to spend an hour driving to the doctor’s office, an hour in the waiting room, half an hour in another waiting room, a nurse to take diagnostics, then the doctor finally coming in and saying, “Yep. It looks like he is allergic to mosquito bites.” (it looked like the plague…seriously)

What I am saying is that this is the future. ¬†Right now. Not only do we not have flying cars or hoverboards, but there are some key, day-to-day, “this is the future” things missing.

And there are some things missing in my life. Things I was promised by Jane¬†Jetson, herself. ¬†Man, I watched that show and saw the future! That’s where we were headed, my friends. Flying cars were part of the package of the future…

AS WELL¬†AS…

1.Jane Jetson’s Morning Face:

This woman knew how to skype at 7am on Monday morning.

2. Rosie

If you don’t think you need a sarcastic, dry humored robot in your house, commenting on your children and parenting constantly, you just don’t know what fun is.

3. Magic Menu Jukebox

I don’t know what she is doing with that apron, exactly, but her button pushing finger sure is hard at work.

4. In House ManiPedi with Proto-Roomba

From the fuzzy slippers, to the mani-salon, to watching TV in the middle of the day, to the cupcake Рhamburger Рmilkshake trio coupled with her 14 inch waist going on, everything about this picture is a lie.

5.¬†Doctor’s Visits:

See, that’s what I’m talkin’ about!

So there you have it folks.

Jane Jetson’s vision of the future.

Just one ill-conceived, futuristic, anti-social facade after another.

Itza Pizza! Recipe

Hey, anyone else stupidly excited about Jurrasic World?

Because I am stupidly excited about Jurrasic World. I’m taking a couple of the older kids to the movies this afternoon, and I am going to dream about dinosaurs all night.

I love dinosaur movies. Godzilla. The Land Before Time. King Kong, especially the recent King Kong¬†. ¬†I think I love that we are trying to recreate the world using our imaginations…and sometimes that is amazing. ¬†Sometimes, it is weird. Sometimes it is terrifying…but that’s what a good story is. It takes you somewhere that you could never get to on your own. ¬†And I love a good journey ūüôā

SO, with that being said: today is a great pizza day!

 

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The best thing about this recipe: it actually tastes like pizza.

It isn’t made out of cauliflower, quinoa, tofu, asparagus or unicorns.

It is a straight up, solid, easy pizza recipe.

 

Okay, so I have been making this pizza all week for lunch, because it is amazingly easy…and the kids go nuts over it.

There are no leftovers with this pizza.

Ben tried it the other day, and even he said it “tastes¬†really good,” was “very filling,” and is “a great lunch.”

These are reviews us mothers live for. ūüėČ ¬†Seriously, after a few days of sandwiches at home, you have to start thinking outside the box for meals. ¬†And since we eat at home every day, I run out of interesting ideas unless I spend a good hour in front of a notebook once a week brainstorming meal planning.

So here you go! An easy pizza recipe anyone can make!

IMG_4066 (1)

 

 

Ingredients:

Dough-

  • 5 cups flour
  • 1 cup oil
  • 1 tsp kosher salt
  • 1 cup of warm water
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 1 Tbsp yeast

Sauce-

  • 3 cups of canned/diced tomatoes
  • 1 can of tomato paste
  • 1 tsp garlic powder
  • 1/2 tsp kosher salt
  • 1/2 red bell pepper, sliced
  • 1/2 yellow bell pepper, sliced
  • 2 cups of shredded cheddar cheese

 

What’chu Do:

  1. Preheat oven to 125F
  2. Add the yeast, warm water and sugar to a mixing bowl. Let sit and froth for 5 minutes.
  3. Add flour, salt, and oil and mix until smooth. You may need to add a little more water, but add it ta tablespoon at a time.
  4. Pour the dough onto parchment paper on a baking sheet, smooth out to all corners and put the sheet into the oven to rise for 30 minutes.
  5. While the dough is rising, make the sauce, slice up the bell peppers and shred the cheese
  6. Take the dough out of the oven and raise the temperature to 375F
  7. Pour the sauce and bell peppers onto the dough and spread gently with a spatula
  8. Sprinkle the cheese over the sauce
  9. Place back into the oven for 20 minutes
  10. Let cool before you start cutting it…and then enjoy thoroughly!!

 

 

 

IMG_4070 (1)Happy Pizza Kids

 

Unwelcome Distractions

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These are welcome distractions.

They are cross stitch pictures you hang on your wall, and they are rather rustic, but very pretty.  This store has some other lovely distractions, such as scented candles and floral strands with which to decorate your home.  These are distractions in life.  They take your eyes away from what you were doing for a moment, and then you get back to whatever you were doing.

 

Tim Hunt, a Nobel prize winning scientist, is under a lot of pressure these days, and it isn’t from lab cultures that just won’t work out…

It is from antiquated cultures in the lab that just won’t die.

 

English biochemist, the Nobel-prize winner Sir Richard Timothy 'Tim' Hunt meets with the press at the Jozsef Attila Study and Information Centre of Szeged Sciences University in Szegede on March 22, 2012, during an international conference series held on the occasion of the 75th anniversary of Hungarian Albert Szent-Gyorgyi?s Nobel Prize Award. The event be attended by nine Nobel Laureates and nearly 1000 scientific researchers from all over the world.  Albert Szent-Gyorgyi received the nobel prize in Phisiology or Medecine in 1937 for discovering, among other things, vitamin C and the compontents and reactions of the citric acid cycle.  AFP PHOTO / CSABA SEGESVARI (Photo credit should read CSABA SEGESVARI/AFP/Getty Images)
English biochemist, the Nobel-prize winner Sir Richard Timothy ‘Tim’ Hunt meets with the press at the Jozsef Attila Study and Information Centre of Szeged Sciences University in Szegede on March 22, 2012, during an international conference series held on the occasion of the 75th anniversary of Hungarian Albert Szent-Gyorgyi?s Nobel Prize Award. The event be attended by nine Nobel Laureates and nearly 1000 scientific researchers from all over the world. Albert Szent-Gyorgyi received the nobel prize in Phisiology or Medecine in 1937 for discovering, among other things, vitamin C and the compontents and reactions of the citric acid cycle. AFP PHOTO / CSABA SEGESVARI (Photo credit should read CSABA SEGESVARI/AFP/Getty Images)

 

I feel bad for the guy, because I don’t think he was being malicious at all with his recent comments about women being “distractions” in the lab:

 

Three things happen when [women] are in the lab: You fall in love with them, they fall in love with you and when you criticize them, they cry,” said Hunt.”

 

The problem is, even if he wasn’t being malicious…he was being pretty stupid.

The problem is not women.

They aren’t “women in the lab.” ¬†They are fellow scientists. Fellow scientists who are working on the study of cyclin proteins and their role in cell division, perhaps. The problem isn’t that they are distractions…the problem is that some men blame their fellow women peers for the problems they, themselves, are facing.

 

Perhaps the 3 things that happen when men are in the lab is that they have problems with interpersonal relationships in the workplace and difficulties with facilitating and responding to different responses to situations in the lab, as well as problems developing and maintaining relationship boundaries in the lab.

Could be that, right Tim?

 

And yet, that cannot be it, either. ¬†It is just as absurd to see men as the problem, any more than to see women as the problem. ¬†Men and women¬†are working¬†side by side in workplaces everyday, and creating and innovating incredible¬†things on teams together; and although we are always learning how to work together in better, more sensitive and beneficial ways…we are all learning together.

Sometimes it takes some dumb statements to advance the conversation of what is appropriate and what is not.

 

Problems with work relationships isn’t a new topic, though. A few years ago, CNBC’s Van Moody said,

Success in the workplace depends on your ability to relate effectively to people. Research shows that 60 to 80 percent of all difficulties in organizations stem from strained relationships between employees, not from deficits in an individual employee’s skill or motivation…Your success at work depends on your ability to set the kinds of boundaries that encourage mutual respect and keep the focus on productivity.

 

The problem is when people cannot set healthy boundaries at work, or just in life.

 

I’ve seen it before…honestly, I’m sure we all have.

There was a bbq I was attending a while back, and I struck up conversation with a woman who was visiting.  I thought her hair looked darker than the last time I had seen her, and asked if it was indeed a different shade, or if I just remembered her hair differently.  Actually, she had dyed it recently, and she liked it much better darker.  She and I talked about the problems we found with dying dark hair, and which colors do better in the sun, etc.  It was a nice conversation, and I enjoyed talking with her.

Unfortunately, there was a man there who decided it was his responsibility to warn us about how distracting women’s hair can be for men. ¬†We got this lurid story about a woman he worked with once who had dyed her hair darker, and went on to tell us in great detail how she made it impossible for any of the men to work because of her radiant beauty. ¬†Apparently, all the men were distracted by their need to have sex with this woman.

“So, you really should be careful when you go out. You could be distracting all the men around you, and you¬†could be a problem.”

I really couldn’t believe what I was hearing from this man. ¬†This man who had a wife and 5 daughters. ¬†This man who was warning other adult women that it was our fault when men become distracted by their own, possibly inappropriate, sexual urges. ¬†This man had the gall to¬†warn me about the dangers of women being distractions.

It was absolutely unreal, and I honestly didn’t know what to say. ¬†It was not my house and I didn’t want to pound this man into the ground at someone else’s bbq…but on the other hand, this cannot go on. ¬†This man was notorious for making completely inappropriate advances to younger women, and I was sick of it. Has anyone told this guy that this kind of discussion with women is inappropriate? ¬†Ever?

I took it up with the pastor of our church, and also the owner of the home; I discussed it with the wife, the adult daughter who was there and we talked with the sister of the pastor, with whom I was having the conversation with. I most certainly discussed it with Ben, and we both were surprised and disgusted by the behavior of this man we thought we knew.

The women agreed that this man was, indeed, notorious for making inappropriate comments to younger women, and they admitted to feeling very uncomfortable around him because of his unwelcoming behavior towards them.  They said it had been happening for years, and I recalled the year before when he pulled similar behavior with a friend I had invited.  I had hoped that was just an isolated incident; but apparently, it was an ongoing event.

What was most surprising was not the man’s behavior, nor even the outrage and disgust we and the women felt because of this man, but the other men’s response to his behavior.

The official reply was, “Oh, that’s just Don*.”

Oh, that’s just Don.

Don is not a problem?  Really? Don is allowed to make inappropriate sexual comments to the younger women in our families?  Don has no reproach from anyone when he leers over younger women?  This is the first time anyone has spoken up about Don? Nothing has been done before?

 

There wasn’t much more we could do except to communicate to the younger women: “This is not appropriate behavior, and you do not have to listen to men tell you that you are a distraction. ¬†You are not a distraction, you are a woman. It is their problem. You are not the problem. ¬†If this happens again, you can speak up with your voice and tell him, or any person, that they have no right to tell you that you are a distraction or a problem. ¬†This is their problem, and you have the ability to tell them that this is their problem. Not yours. And we have your back any time this happens. You have our¬†full support in saying ‘no.'”

To say I was disappointed in the men is putting it lightly. ¬†I can have no respect for a man who refuses to stand up for the women in his life. ¬†They are cowards and they don’t deserve to be called men of integrity. ¬†On the other hand, I was enormously proud of the young women for not believing what Don was telling them, and acknowledging that what he said was inappropriate. ¬†That is a big step, and I was relieved that they made the first step for themselves.

 

So, I do feel badly for Tim Hunt.

I think that maybe he never had a woman tell him his behavior was inappropriate, and maybe he simply didn’t understand how demeaning and objectifying, and stupid, his comments are to the women with whom he works.

Until now.

 

 

 

 

*not his actual name.

Adventures With Jellies

IMG_4054

 

What you can barely see in this bucket is a clear, moon jellyfish.

This thing was about 3 inches in diameter, and easy to see in the bucket if you were there…not so much on a picture.

Last night we went to the beach with the kids to play in a little inflatable boat and wade in the water.  I keep forgetting it is saltwater, because from where we are it looks like a lake.  But saltwater it is, and it is sticky and a little grimy; most certainly not lake water.

We discovered the plume of jellyfish in the most unfortunate way: while swimming with them. Now, I will give you peace of mind by saying no one got stung. These guys are pretty harmless, and there was no pain or cause for alarm. ¬†I was pretty sure of¬†this, being a nature trivia junkie, and I reconfirmed it with some research and asking the locals (“clear is fine, yellow is painful, avoid the red.”)

However, the discovery of hundreds of jellyfish floating merrily next to the kids’ legs may have been a good time for the jellies, but it did not go over well with the kids. ¬†At all. ¬†One in the water panicked, and started swimming into deeper Sound (had to turn him around and direct him onto the shore). Another cried all the way back to the car out of fear of death by moon jellies, and most of the way home. And the rest were generally grossed out during the ordeal. Finally, one fell on the beach and scraped both knees on barnacles, and was a little bloody mess. Some¬†beaches here are so covered in barnacles it is impossible to walk in flip flops…boots are kind of an absolute must, especially on this beach, in particular.

We placated the situation with Happy Meals and showers.

I am grateful the kids are still young enough that this still works.

 

 

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